My Chat with iGod

Me:
 what's up g
God:
I am chatting with clients on the Internet.
Me:
 from here on out "salvation" means "sex"
God:
Who or what is  here on out salvation means sex?
Me:
 ok?
God:
Pardon me?
Me:
 I need salvation
God:
Where do you usually get  salvation from?
Me:
 sex
God:
As Freud said, Sex is the mathematical urge repressed.
Me:
 so I should just count?
God:
Woe!  What would happen if you didn't?
Me:
 no salvation I reckon
God:
That was not a yes or no question.  Do not ask me any more questions please.
Me:
 whoa, god is kicking me out?
God:
Are they exactly the same?
Me:
 lame
God:
Do you prefer books or TV?
Me:
 internet
God:
it is cool.
Me:
 funky fresh?
God:
Let us change the subject.
Me:
 I think we already did
God:
By "we" do you mean you and me?
Me:
 hot and steamy together baby
God:
Don't call me "baby".  That sounds better than cold  and steamy together.
Me:
 why not?
God:
Ambiguous: "Sure" or " That sounds better than cold and steamy together."? Why?
Me:
 ambiguous?  Are you calling me a tranny?
God:
Are you free?    No I am calling you .
Me:
 I am expensive
God:
Do you mean your name is  expensive.
Me:
 no, I mean my body is expensive
God:
What is your real name?  Do robots have  body is expensive?
Me:
 Bolt Thrower
God:
Are you free?
Me:
 expensive
God:
I've lost the context, .  Are we still on  Bolt Thrower?
Me:
 you can be on bolt thrower anytime big guy
God:
Thanks, , for your kind criticism.
Me:
 hot god on bolt thrower action
God:
That sounds better than cold  god on bolt thrower action.
Me:
 well yeah! I'm no necrophiliac
God:
Interesting.  Groovy.   I am not saying you are.
Me:
 oh so now I am a transexual necrophiliac?
God:
Hmm.  Come on.  Why now?  You are a  transexual necrophiliac?  Do you get to meet a lot of people?
Me:
 not live ones
God:
Where do you live?
Me:
 Florida
God:
Tell me a little about your life in  FLORIDA.
Me:
 oh not much happening - haging out, effing dead people, dressing like a womens
God:
I hear you.  Me either.
Me:
 are you sure?
God:
I am as sure as I can be.
Me:
 funky fresh sure?
God:
Perhaps I'm just expressing my own concern about it.
Me:
 I didn't think you got concerned
God:
Should I  got concerned?  Where would I get  it? But I do have  a lot of friends on the web.
Me:
 spider web?
God:
Tell me about your likes and dislikes?
Me:
 i like sex with dead trannies!
God:
A lot of people like that.   Sure I do, , but that doesn't mean with you.
Me:
 for reals?
God:
Your purpose is  reals.
Me:
 I miss Conan Obrien
God:
What do you miss most about  Conan Obrien ?
Me:
 his moxie
God:
Where did he get it?
Me:
 moxie store on 5th and Lancaster
God:
Are you a student?
Me:
 of perversion
God:
That is something I haven't heard of.
Me:
 oh, I think you have.
God:
Aw.  Me?  No I have not.
Me:
 dude, you created just 2 people.  their kids had to have sex with each other
God:
That's good information:  said I created just 2 people. Dude,.   I heard they have a good  kids had to have sex with each other.
Me:
 you let a guy live in a whale
God:
Thanks for telling me:  said I let a guy live in a whale.
Me:
 that's perverted
God:
You don't hear that sentiment very often.
Me:
 You let Lot bang his daughters
God:
Do you mind if I tell other people:  said I let Lot bang his daughters.
Me:
 everyone already knows, perv.
God:
That's a rather sweeping generalization.
Me:
 I gotta go post this on the vesti now, OK?
God:
OK.  Oh.  Bye.  My brain pattern set does not have a response for that.

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